Quitting a job is not as great as it sounds

So during my holiday in Vietnam I was not just vacationing. I was getting another job. See, before my holiday I had a job interview somewhere and the day after my holiday I had my second interview and I was hired. Now as you might have read before, I was not out of a job or something, I simply saw an opportunity at a company that I have loved since forever, so I decided I would try it (again). And this time, even though it was very unexpected, it worked!

While that is obviously very exciting news, making a fresh start at a company that many Dutchies would love to work for, there is also a downside: I had to quit my current job. A job I have had for 2.5 years which makes it my longest fulltime job to date. During my holiday I was already thinking about this fact. When a new job is still far away and you are a bit unhappy about things in the office, you sometimes fantasise about just quitting your job. Just barge into the office of your boss and yell at him: I CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE, I QUIT! or THIS IS THE FIFTH TIME MY COLLEAGUES PUT A KICK ME-POST IT ON MY BACK, I AM LEAVING THIS AWFUL COMPANY!

Thankfully that last thing never happened to me, and that is actually also what sucked so much about quitting my job. So during my holiday I had thought of all these ways of telling my boss and my colleagues that I was leaving. I am Dutch and very direct so I did not just bluntly want to blurt out: “So I have some news, I am leaving the company.” I thought, let’s sit down together, have a lovely and funny conversation about how amazing the company and the colleagues are, and then tell people that even though I love all of that, I was quitting.

Amazing stories I had in my head about telling it, but as the time started to run out, I really got more nervous about telling people. How would they respond? I thought they would either be happy to finally be able to find a good, professional PA that gets her nails done and walks around in pumps all day looking amazing. Or they would be angry with me for not showing enough signs of wanting to leave the company.

So when the moment came and I broke the news to people, I said it super bluntly, exactly like I did not want to say it. What I did not expect (and especially as I was saying it in such a Dutch way), was that people were going to be so nice to me all of a sudden. It has been horrible. I have told my colleagues this news two weeks ago, and ever since I have people coming up to me giving me compliments, telling me that should I ever change my mind and I can always come back, et cetera.

It. is. horrible.

It makes me feel so much like an a-hole for leaving, and like a bad person for sometimes being super frustrated with people. But it also makes me very happy, it makes me confident about starting a new job, it makes me feel like what I did here actually did matter. And I must say, that is the best feeling in the world. I am never quite sure if I am doing things right, because I am both PA and journalist, and I always feel like I am in between, which means: not excelling in any of the two. And here I am now, people being super appreciative, saying so many nice things, making me feel so sorry about leaving!

Really, it had never occured to me that this could happen, I thought people would just leave me be for the month I still have in the company, while I am searching for a person to replace me. It is the total opposite and I really see how much people care. Sure, not everybody means what they say when they praise my work, but even if one nice thing that one person says is real, I feel very happy and thankful for that.

So, in a few weeks I will have my last day in the office here, and the day right after I will start my new career (thank god for leap years… 😉 ). It is all very exciting, and I will try to make another little work blog about my first few days in my new job as a management assistant, but for now I am insanely busy trying to leave my current company as best as I can, because everybody has been so nice to me, that is the least thing I can do. A-holes… 😉

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