So as the break-up happened, lots of stuff in my life has changed and is about to change. My ex is about to move out of the house, meaning I will stick around, paying for the mortgage myself, until I am able to sell the house. I am not in a super big hurry with selling the house, as our neighbour’s house is still for sale, and there is simply too much stuff to be done around the house before it is even remotely sell-able.
The blog I posted yesterday was written months ago, and there are many things that have changed by now. I do not allow myself to spend too much time thinking about things, and I am happy that I am kinda positive about it all. Many people around us do not understand, his parents keep on texting me to come over, even though I already had a “goodbye”-meet up with them. It is very sweet though, and we have been through a lot of hell in those past six years.
But other than announcing the break-up on Facebook, knowing that he will be leaving soon and the people around us reacting to it, I am doing pretty well. I am at peace about sthe relationship situation. What I am not too relaxed about, it my financial situation. As I can be pretty impulsive, it is difficult to stick to my budgets strictly. I am doing a great job until now, I have not really bought a lot, but I do realise that there is no longer something (or someone) to fall back on: it is time to do it myself.
And though it frightens me, it also makes me feel stronger and more free. How cool would it be to be able to pay for the house myself, and still have a life? The latter is difficult, especially these first few months, having to adjust, but I am positive I will make it. For the first time in my life I am really trying to save money for a holiday first, before I actually book it, which is pretty awesome. This might sound insane when you read this, but it’s the sad truth ๐
Saving money goes slow though, especially cause the house is expensive and I am trying to make some changes to it, like painting my black wall white (sorry Rolling Stones, I am doing exactly what you do not want me to! ๐ ). I was very happy when I was done, cause I did it all by myself. The only thing is I should be picking out colors for accents, and I can’t really decide on any colors as I like bright stuff, and house buyers like the boring dull colors that you can’t really see. ๐
Even though my blog from yesterday scared some people, please be aware that I am doing well, I am very excited about the future, it is going to be a whole new chapter for me, and I am going to rock! (I will probably read this blog myself whenever I feel like I can’t ๐ ). There is so much in life to be thrilled about, and I am glad I at least have the opportunity to try to do things on my own. I hope my “strength”ย will last though!