So last year was my most holiday filled year ever, with a trip to South Africa, Berlin, Italy, Los Angeles, Canada, Brussels, London, and I am probably forgetting one. Lots of amazing and far trips, and I absolutely loved that year. It was not cheap, but it was totally amazing. But I knew my 2016 would not at all be filled with holidays, as I was changing jobs, out of money, et cetera. Thankfully my parents took me to Vietnam in January/February, otherwise I would probably be in a corner of my bedroom bashing my head against the wall right now.

This month I will be going abroad, but not very far: Berlin and Cologne, both work related holidays. It is still going to be fun and I truly looking forward to both trips, but the idea of not having any far things planned makes me a bit sad. Especially cause I do not know if I will ever be able to take a far trip again, as my home situation has changed drastically which means I do not have the financial richness that I used to have.

I know I will probably have one or two far away trips next year, as I promised myself I was going to visit Japan before turning 30, and there might be a super awesome wedding happening in India that I really want to attend (plus seeing the Taj Mahal, finally, a hopeless romantic like me needs that, and I need a bit of Eat Pray Love anyway 😛 ). Anyway, at work everybody is going on holiday, taking time off to just lay on a beach and do nothing, and sometimes I envy that. Often I don’t, cause I am happy I am more the explorer type of person and that I love working so much I take days off to do it 😉 But sometimes I think: it would be pretty awesome to just lay on a beach for a week reading books.

Mainly this feeling occurs when I realise I haven’t planned anything big yet, as I always get like that. But it is probably just a few things coming together: not having the funds to actually pay for a holiday, having the Japan deadline that I made myself when I was a teen, coming down from that holiday high I had last year, and not knowing in general where I will be at in 6 months from now. The control freak in me is like: WHAT IS HAPPENING, EVERYTHING WAS FINE!? 😉

I will survive, I am learning a lot, and I know there will be better days again. I am just waiting on a lot of things right now, that need to happen before I can make my mindset change to the next level. My wanderlust is kicking in, but I am pushing it back, for now. Hope stuff will be happening soon, cause I think I am ready.